Are you a good mom?  You’ve probably asked yourself this question at least once before.  I know I have.  

The thing is, I can guarantee you’re already doing so many things right, and the fact that you’re even thinking about how to be a better mom for your kids tells me you are on the right track for some amazing parenting.  

But we could all use some tweaks and fresh ideas here and there, so I’m excited to offer you 10 ways to be a more mindful mom this year so that you’ll show up better for your kids and for yourself — because effective parenting is so much more about what we bring to the table than anything else. Are you ready?

Here are 10 mindful ways to be a better (happier!) mom this year:

1. Learn to communicate better with your kids.

 Is your home plagued by power struggles?  Do you find yourself yelling at your kids?  This year make it your goal to learn how to respond to your kids thoughtfully, confidently and compassionately instead of reacting and letting your emotions wreak havoc in your home.  Learning to have effective interactions with your kids will directly impact their willingness and follow through with chores, their behavior, and whether or not they see you as a source of guidance and support.  Make your mama voice safe – so that you can continue to have a say on who they’re growing up to be.  Next time you find yourself in the brink of a meltdown, pause, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, what is really going on here?  Try to see beyond the behavior and figure out what the real need is.   

2. Set limits without being overbearing.

Kids love structure, but they also love the ability to be independent and try out things on their own.  When possible, try to set guidelines and boundaries with some flexibility for choice.  And let kids have some input in the process.  

3. Create systems that makes your day flow more smoothly.

There’s something to be said about having a plan and using routines that are efficient and effective.  Create a plan for key moments in the day, such as mornings and bedtime so that everyone knows what is expected.  Once you find what works, teach it to your kids and be consistent with it.  Not only will it reduce stress for everyone, but you are also teaching kids how to set themselves up for success by organizing their life so they can meet their responsibilities.

4. Teach your kids to love learning.

Fall in love with learning and pass it on to your kids.  You are your kids’ first and most important teacher and life coach.  Foster a sense of curiosity and creativity by always looking to incorporate learning in your daily activities.  Don’t know where to start?  Begin by reading to your kids every day.  Not only will it help them academically, but it will also strengthen your relationship and give you a great chance to have meaningful conversations with them. 

5. Learn to say no.

Don’t buy into the schedule and activity overload mentality.  Overcommitting actually causes you to miss out on what is most important – your kids!  Be clear on what your goals are for your family and put those on the schedule first, then fit in what you can around it.  Also, don’t forget to leave some room for yourself.  You can’t show up as your best when you’re drained of energy.  Give yourself some room to recharge.

6. Get a handle on stress.

When you’re stressed, everyone feels it – even if you think you’re hiding it well.  Your kids are so perceptive!  They know you and they can feel it when you’re tense and on edge.  Give yourself permission to take care of yourself so that you can be the mom your kids need you to be.  Find some quiet time, meditate, exercise, talk with a friend – make time to take care of your own emotional wellness and be the example for your kids so they too can learn to manage stress in healthy ways.

7. Let go of the “mommy guilt.”

Learn to operate out of a growth-mindset, where mistakes are just learning opportunities.  Give yourself permission to be human; to have needs and wants and off moments.  It’s okay.  I know your heart is in the right place.  You are not striving for perfection, you are striving for purpose.  Be kind to yourself.  

8. Stick with your health and fitness goals.

Make this the year that you follow through.  I know there are a ton of other things vying for your time and attention, but if you want to go the distance, you’re going to have to take care of yourself. Plus, the more you focus on living a healthy lifestyle, the more your kids will learn to do it too.  Lead your family into health this year by coming up with a plan that is easy to follow and sustainable.  You got this!

9. Take care of your relationships.

You do not have to do this parenting (or life!) thing alone.  Why would you want to?  The fun is in the mix.  Nurture your friendships, reconnect with your spouse, and make your bond with your kids one that will last a lifetime.  We are made for community.  Surround yourself with people who support and inspire you, be a good friend to others, and continue to deepen your connection with your significant other and your kids.

10. Find yourself again. 

Having kids is one of the most rewarding experiences we can have, but it’s so easy to lose ourselves in the process.  Find time to think about and set some personal goals for yourself.  Your kids and family can be your main priority and focus, but they don’t have to be your ONLY one.  Work on making your life more balanced by nurturing those other aspects of yourself that make your eyes light up.  What else (besides your kids, of course) do you feel passionate about?  What is something you always dreamed of doing?  

I hope you found these tips useful.  Which ones will you try?  Let me know by leaving a comment below.

Also, check out my FREE Facebook Group, Mindful Moms Finding Balance, for more tips and inspiration.  Join here.  Hope to see you there!